No sports. No exercising. Those are two things that best describe my interests, or I guess, the lack thereof. The only exception to this rule is when I momentarily transform myself into an insanely focused, supersweaty, red-faced CrossFit junkie. When is that moment you ask? It’s that moment when you tell yourself that “you got this” and you are damn certain all those years of practice won’t let you down. And now here it is, the moment has arrived. It’s go time and you are feeling prepared. You slap your hands together, plant your feet shoulder-width apart, as you yell out a loud “wooooo”. You take a deep breath and get into squatting position to brace yourself for what’s to come. Except, this is no ordinary weight of heavy dumbbells. This is the extraordinary weight of… 17 DAMN HEAVY GROCERY BAGS!
Just the thought of having to make several trips from my car to my apartment annoys me like no other. I’d rather risk a broken back and burning indentations on my forearms and palms from the weight of carrying what feels like 100 grocery bags than make more than one trip to and from the car. Not to mention, the ungodly stares you get when you happen to look up and lock eyes with your neighbor mean nothing when I successfully make it to my front door with all groceries in hand.
So, I’ve channeled my inner Deepak Chopra to meditate on the root cause as to why I feel the need to be a one-trip pony. With the help of divine forces, I have come to a conclusion about my aversion to multiple trips. (And no, it’s NOT due to laziness? Oh no, no, no.) The real truth ladies and gentlemen is that deep down inside I have been gifted with the warrior spirit, a warrior who is not afraid to stand up to any challenge, to fight a good fight and win, and through all my years on this earth, I have… nah… who am I kidding? Maybe I’m just a sherpa at heart. Nope, not even that. I guess I’m just… determined. Ah yes, there it is. I am determined… Except when a few coins fall onto the ground when I unzip my wallet to pay… Only then, I am 100% lazy.
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